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Location: london, United Kingdom

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

6am. I had an epiphany

Incidentally this coincides with my 100th post.

Before posting this I went back and read the first few posts in my blog. LoL they were bad. I'm not surprised no one read them. I know a few people read it now and I'm very grateful for the comments posted. It's a real wierd feeling to know people read what I write, even though its mostly BBV (beats, brags, variace).
Virtually everyone who reads this blog plays the same limits as me, or 1 up/1down. Something like that. Since my blog has been pretty much just BBV I'd like to give back to people for actually spending time reading. However I'm not much of a writer since I was uberlazy back in school (was pretty good at math tho!) so instead I'm gonna do as much as I can in video format.
I've read a lot of articles and forum posts about stuff like BR management, tilt management etc and am in agreement with a lot of them. However there is also stuff that i agree 95% with, but find 5% a bit iffy or left out. It's this 5% that I think I'll be psoting about on here occasionally.
Anyways, video wise I do enjoy making them. It's real funny to watch them back and see what I was actually thinking at the time. I am now gonna post at least 1 per week. At the moment my bread and butter game is 6 tabling the 6-max NL50 game. I have played NL100 over a small sample but a combination of tilt/downswing/burnout meant that i didnt stay long (even though I was properly rolled).

Most vids will be 2 tables so that I don't get too distracted. I'm not sure what to actually make right now, so if anyone has any requests pls post in the comments. You can request any limits upto NL100, LHE1/2 and $22 SnGs. So if you wanna see LHE0.25/0.5 or $5.50 SnGs go right ahead, but forget MTTs I'm a complete donk at them. The vids have a clause that I'm not a poker authority in anyway, so I'm sure sometimes I'm make clear mistakes and bonehead plays, especially at NL100 where any vid I make I'd love critiqued.
If they end up looking crap... well you get what you paid for - nothing! lol. I won't ever edit any of them (mainly because I'm WAY too lazy to figure out how) but I guess I may scrap a few if say I crash out first in an STT there's not really much point anyone watching it. It's unlikely I'd scrap any cash, no matter how boring. Who know's you might get to see one of my tilt ones (hope not tho!)

Anyway on to the epihpany. I've realised that poker is messing me up in ways I had never considered. Since I've started playing poker I've put on a stone from 10.5-11.5, Thats a [censored] lot! I've decided I'm getting my ass back in the gym and gonna burn that crap away. As well as an unhealthy body, I've got a real unhealthy mind. Not that its filthy (ok it is), but that I'm now nowhere near as sociable as I used to be. There's been SO many parties, drinks, dinners, movies that I passed on in the past 6 months or so, ever since it turns out I make a pwnage amount of $$ playing poker. I've actually passed on a date once, and in 3 clear cases indirectly passed on sex when there's been girls who've wanted me to ask them out but I was took busy thinking about fold equity to switch my head back around to normal life. This is seriously NOT +EV. Thinking back now I'm like 'WTF YOU LOSER!!'. The worst part is, its totally true, wtf was I doing.
This is NOT what I wanted from the 'freedom' of poker. When I first started I never considered myself to have anywhere near the skills to pay any bills. I expected to bust first time. Now I'm stuck with it. I crashed and burned in my 3rd year of uni. I now have to repeat half of it. WTF!?? When I was in school I pwned exams like there was nothing to it. I never ever revised properly except for GCSE History. Apart from that I cruised. I wasnt THE best, but I was pretty good, I scored AAB at A2 level (Maths, Economics, History).
Now I failed my last year at uni... something has got to change and its my mentality to everything. My mentality is 'leave it till tomorrow'. Right now I have laundry lying on my bed that I've had 8hrs to put away. Again, wtf?

I've realised poker made me lazy. I didn't bother sorting things out, studying even hanging out with people (and this can bee seen from my lack of any meaningful conversation with my houstmates. in defence they're moving out in 1 month). Life is not jsut about $$, its about being healthy having fun and having something that really means something to you. Poker means shitall to me. I only play for the money, and that's something I want to address. I don't contribute anything to society at all, apart from possibly creating degenrate gamblers. Yeah sure I don't play high enough that anyone isn't eating off it, but I'm sure there's players out there who've lost pots to me then moved higher to win it back and eventually lost a lot more than they thought they could (martingale theory= suxors. fwiw you're a total idiot to keep doubling your bets everytime you lose when gambling. This applies to every game, including most promiantly roulette and BJ. To beat BJ, card count. To beat roulette, 'doctor' the wheel). This actually makes me feel bad and is really hard to justify. Am I providing 'entertainment' for these people? Do they like losing?

So a career path eh? Recently I've decided real estate is a career path of interest. I'm gonna look into it (even though I'm not totally sure how and where). It sounds interesting to me because a lot of what you actually earn is merit based. Sell a house, get commision. Don't sell anything, get fired. I do however know little about the job/ market apart from what I learnt in economics (ok a decent amount) and what I've seen on location, location, location. My mum says that at least I'd learn how to buy a house myself although poker players can't get mortgages...

Anyway thats possibly a little bit more about my life than you guys may have been expecting this time round, and really I'm surprised I did share so much. Maybe it's because no one I talk to in real life has any idea of what I'm going through during prolonged downswings and they jsut think I'm boasting when i say stuff like 'yeah made £100 in 30mins this morning, then decided to take the day off'. It's my own fault I should be more considerate since many of my friends work £5/hr jobs.

cliff notes: I'm gonna become a better all round person, and if you want to see a poker vid with commentary at any particular game/limit shout asap. I'll prob make one on the first request and keep them coming if you can, otherwise I'll just make vids on random stuff..


Blogger Mattastic said...

Good post Andy.

I've found that playing poker can seriously isolate you in society unless you have other poker buddies around you who know what you're talking about and that the game isn't just a luckbox where everyone stakes their homes and cars on one hand like on TV. I've gained a few friends through poker and made a little bit of money through poker but it has also played it's part in many an argument, cause me stress and contributed to the failing of my recent relationship.

I too sometimes feel the need to give something back to society but I'm far too lazy and want a get rich quick scheme which is another reason Poker appeals to me. Real estate is very competitive to get into but can be very rewarding. I think you need to qualify for CIMA or something similar, I'd like to do something similar but I think my bankruptcy will stand in the way of anything remotely finanicial!!

As for videos, I'd like to see some NL25 or NL50 both full ring and 6-max and some $5.50 SnG's, if on Stars. I just cannot beat them on Stars no matter what I do and have lost $350 to the barstewards over the past 200 or so games!

9:41 AM  
Blogger kitaristi0 said...

Nice post, and best of luck.

NL100 6-max videos please.

10:03 AM  
Blogger actyper said...

I think you should call gamblers anonymous. The day you pass up sex for online poker, is the day that you know you need help. :)

How do you make videos? What software do you need?

12:55 PM  
Blogger kitaristi0 said...

Google Camtasia or CamStudio.

5:19 PM  
Blogger Riverrun said...

Great Post!

If you need help on what to expect in the real estate game and how to get into it, drop me a line on my blog and I can help you out.

6:46 PM  

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